A Silent Whisper

It has been too many days that, from time to time, a music comes to my head, is a silent whisper, like those stupid melodies that inadvertently get into your head. Which, at all hours, we believe to hear until we come to sing.

When I was a few years old, and I had the heavy burden of adolescence on my back, my favourite singer was not Lluis Llach. He had very beautiful songs, with a lot of feeling, and very deep. But, at that time, I preferred to hear words of love and that made it better by Joan Manuel Serrat. In addition, we had in common the Poble Sec scenery (popular neighbourhood in Barcelona).

However now , maybe because I do not have to come from outside to talk about love, the music that everywhere resounds within me is another. A music which grows up of anger that is born in the bowels, and which, half way of reason, which lies in the brain, has been stopped in the throat, sometimes in the form of a cry, others as a deep sadness to the point to burst in tears.

Last days and those to will come, are being like a Russian mountain of emotions, now I laugh later I make fun, I am afraid, in the end I feel sad. This feeling, sadness is what today prevails in me.

I recently released a new book (No, I will not make a presentation, you can find it in Amazon if you want it). In order to write it and to prepare the next one, I was literally submerged in the press from the years before the civil war until 1947, all because I wanted to get into the skin of my parents, I wanted to know more about the reality they lived and to understand the reason of their silences. When I finally gave it for good, I thought that I understood them, what I did not expect was that I would play to live a new silence.  [amazon_link asins=’B074BFLQXF’ template=’ProductAd’ store=’estrella0e-21′ marketplace=’ES’ link_id=’d80a42cb-a131-11e7-99c4-e5f1c918d910′]

Suddenly friends who were, have disappeared from the stage of my life, from the real one and from virtual as well. And the funny thing is that there was no discussion or comment that would encourage it, nothing.

Whoever wants to take the trouble to look back on this blog, will see if you take the trouble to look back at this blog, you will see that the whole issue of the independence of Catalonia, I have faced it moderately.

However, now everything has changed, as a good friend advise me, months ago. It’s been time to position yourself, and it is true. I already knew that we would come here, until this moment, what I did not expect was to have to position myself not for a homeland, a country, a shared story. No, all those subjects had been left behind. Now the problem for some are democracy, freedom of expression, mutual respect and dignity. Franco was the last trigger of a revolution he wanted to avoid. Rajoy is writing the script for the end of a regime, which comes from afar

Evil is until there, so someone has scratched its skin all the anger, bile, hatred scorns.

I believe that all this is the result of fear. Fear of things that are happening to us, but also fear of knowing the truth, a truth that can end up removing your world. I’m sorry to tell you, my friends that your world is already unchanged as mine

For years, as I have lived in the comfort of a laid-back world, the world my mother dreamed when the bombs fell on her head, what my father dreamed in the middle of two trenches fighting in the civil war. However, this world was not real. Hatred was still behind.

I do not know how all this will end, but ….this was not companions, it was not

 

This is not like companions, this is not

because so many flowers died,

because we cry so many yearnings.

Maybe we should be brave again

and say no, friends, this is not.

This is not companions This is not like this

no words of peace with barns

or the trade that is made with our rights,

rights that are, which do not do or undo

new bars in the form of laws.

This is not like this, companions, this is not;

they will tell us that it is necessary to wait.

And we hope, certainly, we wait.

It is the waiting of those who will not stop

until it is no longer necessary to say, this is no

 

 

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